In the October 21 Free Lance, Steve Gordon wrote about the evils of roadside call boxes. His letter has finally caused me to see the Libertarian light.
Why put in roadside call boxes to help stranded motorists when they can buy cellular phone (and have monthly charges) or buy CB radios, which died for the most part in the '70s and have limited range? I had already taken Steve's marvelous advice and purchased a cellular phone since I commute over Highway 25, and can't see why anybody else can't do that.
Really, who cares about the people who only take that route occasionally to go to the Gilroy Outlet Malls? Who cares about people who may be coming to visit us from outside of San Benito County? If they don't have the foresight to plan ahead, it's their own fault, right?
Since Mr. Gordon was listed as a businessman at the end of his letter, I can see obvious applications here. I'm hoping to see "Gordon's Wireless" stores popping up at the borders to San Benito County, probably with a sign saying "Next Phone 5 miles".
Steve also points out the evils of our greedy, power-crazed supervisors and government, which led me think about further methods to reduce government in our life by applying the Gordon Method.
For example, who needs the police, a huge government bureaucracy? If someone wants to be safe in their home, all they have to do is spend $300 or so for a nice pump shotgun. To be safe on the streets, they used to be able to buy a cheap handgun -- at least until that megalomaniacal state government passed laws requiring quality standards on guns. Now a consumer might have to spend $400 or more to get a good handgun. But it's still cheaper than our jackbooted police force.
Also, who needs the fire department? If you have a house that cost more than $100,000 (as most do around here), you should be able to justify a ceiling sprinkler system. Many businesses already have them. If all houses had them, we'd have little need for the massive overhead of a public fire department.
And think about roads. Do you know how much it costs to keep roads drivable? As I recall, I've seen estimates of $12 million to fix San Benito County's roads. Let's just get rid of our road maintenance crews entirely.
Come on, people, sport utility vehicles aren't much more expensive than regular cars, and will be much easier to drive through the crumbling roadways. Geo Trackers aren't that expensive, for example. And if you can't afford one of those, how about an off-road motorcycle? Those are cheaper than most cars.
There are other greedy public institutions we could easily eliminate, but I think you get the point. Besides, I have to get going and change my party affiliation down at the county building (another government excess) to become a registered Libertarian. Once I do, after these proposals, I'm sure I'll be running for office on the Libertarian ticket in 1998. Remember, a free society should be taken literally -- nobody should have to pay!
UPDATE: Roadside call boxes have been installed on Highways 25 and 156.